The Courage to Encourage
To have courage means I am able to move forward and take action, despite my fear.
Courage is powerful. It allows me to speak up, share ideas, experiment, stand up for others, etc...But as an individual, the impact of my courage is limited. I lack a multiplier. To encourage is to add a multiplier. It’s a game-changer. To encourage is to equip others to act courageously, even if they lack it. To encourage moves the impact from singular to multiple entities, and the resulting reach is significantly more expansive.
A while back I was watching a show where a scene played out that we’ve all seen hundreds of times. An employee enters his boss’s office. Looking slightly annoyed, the boss looks up at the employee and reluctantly invites them to share. The employee, in a brief moment of courage, boldly shares their desire to apply for an open position. The boss immediately responds, maybe even thinking they're helping the employee, by telling them all the reasons they’re not qualified or ready for the position and that level of responsibility. The conversation has been shut down. The moment of courage, now gone, is marked by rejection. The employee, dejected, leaves having lost their hard-earned moment of courage and learning that an act like this causes pain and should be avoided
To give courage is to give someone the strength to be vulnerable. To continue
to be vulnerable. To push their limits and attempt to expand their horizons.
To discourage is to actively suppress action in the face of fear. For the discouraged, it feeds the fear and invites them to step away from bold action. For the discourager, it diminishes openness for the discouraged’s courageous actions and limits the discourager’s impact to that of a singular courageous person.
It’s true that the employee may not be ready for the position. They may need to continue to develop skills. They may need to gain additional experience. Courage takes vulnerability and, in this moment, the employee is vulnerable. Despite our own insecurities, how we react as a leader will often influence what happens next.
To give courage is to give someone the strength to be vulnerable. To continue to be vulnerable. To push their limits and attempt to expand their horizons.
When faced with scenarios like the above, there’s an exercise I love to engage people in. It’s simple. It’s a reflective exercise designed to collaborate with them to define, assess, and direct. It goes like this.
- What skills are needed to be successful in the desired position? At what level? (Rate 1-10)
- Rate yourself for each of these skills. (1-10)
- With the employee, assess where they are currently at. Are these ratings an accurate representation of their current skills?
- Collaborate on a roadmap to develop deficiencies, close the skills gap, and gain experience.
Taking the time to understand, assess, and define a path forward communicates belief in the person. It is an act of encouragement. It says, “I recognize your vulnerability in your act of courage and I want to help you continue to progress and develop your ‘courage’ muscle.”
What are you doing to encourage those around you?






